5 Myths about Forgiveness

Article by Chris Lewis - extra content for paid subscribers

It’s easy enough to say that we should forgive people, but how do we actually do it? We all know that the Bible teaches that we are supposed to forgive those who hurt and offend us, but if we’re honest I think most of us will admit that forgiving is one of the hardest things in the world to do. Oh, it’s easy enough when it’s a small thing, but what do we do when something really big happens?

When we are betrayed by someone we thought we could trust…

When we or someone we love is the victim of a heinous crime…

When the wound is deep and we really, really hurt…

The Bible says:

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. – Colossians 3:13

And we know that. But how do we do it?

Granted, we won’t be able to solve the whole forgiveness problem in one short blog post. However, today I’d like to share with you a few lessons I learned several years ago that I believe can help.

If we are going to get past that wall that makes it so difficult to forgive some people, we need to make sure that we have a clear understanding of what forgiveness is and what it is not. There are some myths about forgiveness that a great deal of people believe, and these myths become stumbling blocks that result in a lot of people not forgiving. Below is a response to five common myths. If we can replace the lies with the truth about forgiveness, I believe many of us can make great strides toward finally giving up the poison of bitterness and learning to forgive.

1. Forgiving is not forgetting; it’s letting go

I remember preaching a whole sermon about this once a number of years ago, and after I finished somebody came up to me and said, “I’m really glad you preached about this. It’s so important. After all, Jesus said, “Forgive and forget.’”

No, he didn’t!

There are various opinions as to the origin of that well-known phrase. Certainly, Shakespeare used a similar phrase in King Lear, and Cervantes used it in Don Quixote de la Mancha in the early 17th Century. But it’s not in the Bible!